I Have a Penis -or- Sorry 'Bout the Male Genitals, Fellas


Category: Men's Health Awareness Campaign

(Music: "One is the Lonliest Number", Three Dog Night)

/Camera draws closer to subject in an very slow swoop. Subject is a morphing sequence of narrators (and their settings settings). The animation is such as to communicate that we are talking to and about EVERY MAN, just ONE at a time. Men of all descriptions intermorph peacefully and fluidly. At a steady pace, they express the following earnest concern:/

"In recent years, women’s health has been a national priority. Pink ribbons warn of breast cancer. Pins shaped like red dresses raise awareness about heart disease. Offices of women’s health have sprung up at every level of government to offer information and free screenings, and one of the largest government studies on hormones and diet in aging focused entirely on older women.

Yet statistics show that men are more likely than women to suffer an early death."


"An early death for having a penis?"


/Morphing characters halt on an individual; a fit, confident-looking early 40s hombre:/

"Well, I have a penis."

/Character morph resumes, more slowly this time, making a point to capture the honorable but intense look in the sequential sets of eyes. Each person, in turn, remarks:/

"I have a penis."


"I have a penis."


"I have a penis.

In fact, right now, there are 140 million penises around you. That's 140 million penises that could be giving you orgasms and babies. So support men's health."


"Listen, ladies -- do you want orgasms and babies or not?"

(Music: Crescendo Chorus)

/Black + "I Have a Penis" Campaign Logo/ CG: 1.800.xxx.xxxx

/Black/ (Music: Out)


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